THERE IS AN EQUAL AND OPPOSITE REACTION

By Coralie Darsey-Malloy

We can act as if there were a God:
Feel as if we were free;
Consider Nature as if she
Were full of special designs;
Lay plans as if we were to be immortal;
We may find that these words
Actually make a genuine difference
In our moral life.

--William James

My mother raised me to live by the Golden Rule: “Do unto others as you would have them do unto you.” I loved those words growing up and I appreciate their significance even more today. While attending the annual general meeting at a local shelter for battered women one of presenters made a comment that created a ‘light-bulb’ moment for me when he said; “With enough love we could resolve all of our human rights issues.” I have been using the ‘pay it forward’ principle and passing that idea on whenever I can. When you pause and allow the truth of it sink in…it opens the mind to a world of possibilities.

So even though the Golden Rule was something Mom and I tried to live by there were times I wasn’t kind, thoughtful or generous. Being raised by an abusive alcoholic father and an enabling mother we were one of those ‘poster child families for dysfunction.’ Patterns within my family of origin led to a variety of health and personal problems for me and there were times I said and did things that went against my better self. There was a tendency to be critical and speak in ways there were insensitive, unthinking…and at times unkind. There was a period in life where I was perpetually late and unreliable because of the chaos within my own life. I had enough awareness to know I was letting people down…but felt ill-equipped to do anything about it.

When I did things that went against the ‘do unto others as you would have them do unto you’ I often trying to justify it away rather than taking a self-responsible approach. What I did not understand back then was that all our actions, both favorable and unfavorable eventually come back to us; and usually not from those we have acted toward. Over the years I have studied everything from physics, metaphysics, theology and the world’s great religions, Buddhism, Eastern religions, Aboriginal Spirituality, the Kabala, Islam, Mysticism, Wicca and Paganism. Through every teaching there is one common thread within them all. In physics there is the third law of motion…that for every action there is an equal and opposite reaction. Within new age thinking people refer to it as Karma.

Once I grasped the larger implications of this ‘law’ I realized the importance of doing a course correction and begin making more responsible choices. Whether people choose to accept it or not every thought, choice and action revolves around us…similar to the earth revolving around the sun. Many are rediscovering this timeless, ageless with the release of ‘The Secret and the Law of Attraction. David and I have applied the principle with some astounding results in different areas of life. Now whenever something is not working we know it is time to stop and examine what we are thinking, doing and saying. Once people begin to assess their attitudes, beliefs and choices they quickly discover that they begin to lead their own lives rather than having life lead them.

Today I have a larger commitment than ever to walk my talk and strive to keep my inner and outer worlds in balance. Living an authentic, accountable life is immensely freeing. As I was able to move through the challenges of my past, transform them and integrate the valuable lessons it became easier to give back to others in unconditional ways. During my healing journey an amazing thing occurred…I learned that happiness is not something you get from other people…it comes in direct proportion to the amount of love you give to others. The; “What goes around, comes around principle continually confirms that the more love we give out...the more of it comes back. Having reached this stage I do my best to live from my center rather than by the opinions of others which is focusing on what feels right, good and loving. After years of abuse and feeling unloved I now know that love isn’t supposed to hurt...and real love doesn't.

In our personal and professional lives we continually see truly amazing changes occur when individuals let go of anger and resentment with friends, co-workers—family that make more loving choices. When love is chosen it is always comes back. The ‘what goes around comes around ‘law of reciprocity is an active principle that governs the cause and effect. When we observe each other it is clear that everyone is performing ‘live’ on the stage we call life. Returns for actions, thoughts and deeds may come in slowly and be less obvious at first…and often accelerate once awareness develops.
It eventually becomes easier to pick up on loving and unloving behaviors and choose accordingly. In closing I decided to include the following poem because it eloquently reminds us how important loving, unconditional giving is within our daily exchanges with others. Random acts of kindness improve the quality of life…and what makes love so important to all of us. So here it is a salute to all those everyday angels who are a blessing whenever they touch our lives…or we touch theirs.